“What IS this?” he burst out, suddenly. I shushed him, glancing around apologetically to the people around us, most still seated in the darkened theater, recovering. He slid down in his seat, clutching his heart, whimpering. I hit him on the arm.
We filed out with the crowd, parting ways to respective restrooms. I emerged from the ladies’, wiping my hands on my jeans. I caught sight of him, slowly pacing the entrance of the mens’, hands behind his back, face downcast. I couldn’t help laughing.
That movie was magic. It touched something in both of us, something nostalgic, hopeful, and painfully sweet. It made me feel sad about unfinished business with forgotten loves (I don’t have any, but still), and made him think about the imperfect beauty of a life in which dreams come true but you still can’t have everything.
We went home, talking all the way, trying to put our thoughts into words. We plopped onto the carpet, listening to that beautiful soundtrack, then ate ice cream and waltzed around our living room. The end of a really good day.
Today is the first day of 2017. At church we were given time to reflect, and think about the things we’d learned and the ways we’d come to understand God this past year. We both agreed that being married has moved the faithfulness and steadfastness of God from a concept into a concrete reality. We remembered His goodness in our times of need, His wisdom in our times of conflict, and His provision in abundance. Remembering all of the times that He had come through for us brought tears that felt like balm to my restless heart. I spent a lot of time this year feeling too harried to connect, too restless to sit still, and then guilty for not giving God my time and attention like I knew I ought. And yet today, I felt the gentle reminder that He is still there, still speaking, still listening. I am so thankful.
Looking forward to 2017… whew! What will it hold?
Handful of Grace 